This article is a fake produced by Psi Phi (not a frat) as propaganda for the Dactyl Hunt, which will take place on Saturday, October 22nd, at 7 PM, in the Science Center quad. A pre-hunt briefing will take place in Kohlberg by the coffee bar. Psi Phi is responsible for the content of this message
On Thursday, Swat Astronomy student P. Siphi detected another mysterious alien transmission, this one apparently a focused signal directed at our campus. “Someone’s trying to talk to us, maybe to warn us,” Siphi said. “The lady in the video’s promising us help against some kind of invasion–I hope we’re not the actual target, because the way she described the invaders sounds serious.”
The video, which appears to show a human-like woman asking the students of Swarthmore to help her in a struggle against a similarly alien “Empire”, was sent multiple times on the same frequency before the source of the transmission abruptly vanished mid-broadcast. The video has been reproduced below.
Whatever the significance of this video, the Daily Gazette advises the student body to be ready for the possibility of an attack by an imperialistic alien power within the next 48 hours.